After living part time in Medellin, Colombia for over half a decade and dating quite a few Colombian women, I’ve learned a few things about the Colombian dating scene.
I decided to write this article to give guys some background info and friendly tips on dating in Colombia, and specifically for dating Colombian women.
This is my unique perspective and I don’t want to over-generalize here because every Colombian woman is different. But in general, there are some truisms for dating women from Colombia.
When I First Came Here In January 2009…
I felt like a little kid in a candy shop, overwhelmed by all the beautiful girls that I would meet throughout the day.
Medellin is easily the most enjoyable place to live in Colombia. You have the perpetual Spring like climate, sub tropical weather, and the wonderfully delightful Paisa Culture (Paisa refers to the local people of Medellin) .
In general, the people of Medellin are very kind, down to earth, and friendly. There is a strong sense of family, loyalty, and openness. So if you are coming here to date Colombian women or find that special someone, you’ve come to a good place.
What’s So Special About Colombian Women?
First off, you should know that there are women out there that are only interested in your money. These gals are scandalous, and later I’ll give you some dating tips on how to avoid these types of gold diggers.
That said, Colombian women lead with their hearts. They are very loving and kind. And once they trust and care for you, they will treat you like a king. It is in their nature to want to take care of their man.
Many Colombian women have fun & laid back personalities. They like to laugh, have a good time, tell jokes, and occasionally gossip. At the same time, they are more passionate, which is awesome in some situations but not so good in others. 🙂
Colombian girls like to dress up and look their best every time they step out the front door. Appearance and hygiene are top priorities in this culture.
They like to be treated like ladies, so you need to be a gentleman. Opening doors, good listening skills, kindness and politeness are all good qualities to use when out on a date with your Colombian gal.
Colombian women also are very social, like good conversation, and to go out on Saturday night. Most love to dance and rumbiar (that’s the verb for partying), so don’t be surprised if they want to go out, drink shots of Aguardiente and dance the night away.
And as the shots of “Guaro” continue, you will also find that they all love to sing famous Colombian songs played at the local bars & disco-techs, regardless of their singing ability. “You got to love that”.
Colombian women almost always have strong connections to their family and friends. So don’t be alarmed if they want to introduce you to their family after a couple of dates.
And it’s not uncommon for them to bring a friend along on the first date. Sometimes it’s their parents who insist on this, other times it just gives them a sense of security when they are first getting to know you.
Girls in Medellin will generally give out their number to most any guy, so don’t feel like you have earned a girl’s attention just by landing her number.
You want to engage her in good conversation and watch her eye contact. The more that she is looking at you, especially in your eyes, the more certain that you can be that your attention is being well received.
To Date Colombian Women – You Got To Prep
Now, if you’re reading this article before you’re actually in Colombia, here are some great tips to get yourself prepped for your trip. It’s ideal if you have a month or two to get yourself ready.
If you’re already in Colombia, follow these same steps to improve you chances of meeting girls.
In general, dating is a numbers game, so the more people that you know, the better chance you have to making social connections and maybe meet someone special.
Here goes…
1. Start practicing your Spanish. Get on duolingo.com for some free Spanish courses. They use a great interactive system to help you learn.
Also, bookmark Spanishdict.com. Another great resource for building your vocabulary and verb conjugation skills.
The majority of Colombian girls know very little English. They know some phrases and a few English greetings. So it’s important to get started on your Spanish right away.
2. Lay off the beer and hit the gym. Girls, Colombian or not, love a man that’s in good shape. Like I said earlier, girls here take great pride in their appearance, and so should you.
3. Get signed up on ColombianCupid.com and Couchsurfing.org. Both are great sites that will allow you to make some friends before you come to Colombia.
Couchsurfing.org is also great for anywhere you want to travel. Put up a free profile, and about a month before you go to your travel destination, send out a genuine letter to girls that you’re interested in getting to know. See if they’d like to hang out.
Ask them if they’d be interested in meeting up for a coffee and showing you around their hometown or city.
That’s such a better experience than being by yourself, wandering a new country or hanging out in a hostel when your minutes from world class destinations.
With ColombianCupid.com, pay the 30 dollar/month membership fee and put up a nice profile. Add some recent quality photos of yourself and a brief description of why you are in Colombia.
With both sites, put in an hour or two each day. Start conversations and make connections before you come to Colombia.
Those that do this, will have dates set up right away. This can be a great way to make some new friends and meaningful connections before you arrive.
4. Lastly, download the app, Tinder, with your smart phone. You’ll meet a lot of interested girls playing with this app.
Tips For Dating Colombian Women
I think the biggest mistake I made when I first moved here was not my lack of effort to approach girls, but my constant approach of taking girls out for dinner on the first date.
Although this seems like a natural step in the dating process, you’ll find every Colombian girl will take a guy up on this proposition.
I have never met a Colombian girl that would turn down free food. 🙂 And they typically order steak, go figure. This can add up to being a costly endeavor if you’re dating multiple women.
First off, you will probably be paying for a taxi for yourself to some high priced restaurant in Parque Lleras, you’ll be paying for her taxi there and back as well. And of course, you’ll be paying for the meal and drinks. It adds up quickly if you’re going out a lot.
It’s very traditional when first dating a Colombian woman that the man pays for everything. As one girl stated to me: “Siempre el hombre paga” – that means the man always pays.
However, there are girls who have good jobs that are happy to share the costs of going out. But this doesn’t happen that often, and it usually happens after you’ve been dating for a while.
Instead, invite your date out to Parque Envigado or Parque Poblado for a cup of coffee or a beer. You can easily sit down and get to know your Paisa while people watching in the park.
This approach does a couple of good things…
1. It weeds out the girls that are only interested in you for a free meal or your money. And if a girl is really interested in you, she’ll make it over to Parque Envigado or Parque Poblado for an impromptu meet up.
2. Plus, you have a nice area to talk and get to know each other, establish rapport, and make a connection. With this approach, you will quickly find out who is really interested in you for who you are.
Lastly, know that in Colombian culture, it is very common for girls to show up late for a date. This is tough for many Western cultures because of how we are raised to be punctual.
It kind of sucks, but in general, just go to your meeting spot 15-30 minutes late or have your girl meet you at your place and then take it from there.
I’ve had girls show up anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour late. Don’t get too frustrated. As the relationship grows, explain your point of view about your cultural values.
10 Awesome Dating Tips For Guys
1. Dress nice. A nice pair of fashionable jeans and a good looking t-shirt will do perfectly. Remember, personal hygiene is huge in this culture. Even if you’re traveling, make sure you clean up good. Brush your teeth twice if there’s any doubt. Use a little cologne, but don’t go crazy.
2. Walk into any room, bar, or restaurant with a big smile on your face. Positivity Attracts!
3. Watch your posture. There’s nothing less attractive than a guy who slumps or carries his shoulders forward.
4. Establish value for yourself. What makes you interesting in life?Maybe you speak a couple of languages, volunteer with disadvantaged youth, or run a successful business. Whatever makes you tick, demonstrate your skills tactfully.
5. Learn Spanish. There is nothing more charming than someone who lets themselves be vulnerable by practicing their imperfect Spanish.
Think back to the first time you met a cute foreign exchange student. Wasn’t their accent adorable? Wasn’t it funny to hear them mispronounce words?
Learning a new language will make you a more interesting person in any new culture.
6. Don’t over praise a girl. Girls who are beautiful know they are beautiful. You have to look past that beauty and try to get to know the person behind those beautiful eyes.
Of course you want to be polite and let your date know that she looks pretty, but then move on and get to know her.
7. Be a good listener and ask open-ended questions. Get your girl to talk about herself so that she feels comfortable around you. Plus, you’ll get to know her and see if she’s really someone you enjoy being with.
8. Be a gentleman. Put your best foot forward and be patient, relaxed, and kind.
9. Don’t flaunt your money. The worst move a Gringo can make! Showing off, buying gifts, and throwing your money around is just the wrong move.
Don’t make this rookie mistake. You want your girl to like your for who you are, not for what you have.
10. Don’t bring a girl back the first night for a one night stand. There has been increasing cases of girls who seduce Gringos by taking them back to their place under the guise of sex, drugging them, and then robbing them blind.
Take a little time and get to know your Colombian girl. Does she come from a good family, is she sociable with other girls and guys, does she enjoy spending time with you, do you with her?
Take your time with this and you’ll soon find that good things can happen.
Best of luck.
Salud!